Starting Anew

I decided to blog again. I want to over share our family life. I want people to get know us other than the social media versions of us.  I’m also hoping these posts will be little memory joggers for my children as they get older.

A few things brought this one. Well maybe more than a few. Here they are: 

It’s hard to post words or drawings on social media without context.  And I have to really explain it. Our humor is weird, jokes are mostly inside and puns are usually intended. Also, there tough subjects we may talk about. There is a lot of judgement and impressions that are made without understanding or having a conversation. With a blog, I know those that follow will have a discussion or at least understand without judgement. 

My little company, Lou & Coops, took a backseat to life and work. We made some big plans. I decided to work and Dustin started contract work, between that and the actual Lou & Coops, there wasn’t much time.  Still reevaluating and working what to do with L&C (the company-not the kids).

We had friends that wanted us to start a podcast. Which let me tell you as entertaining as it for us to spar back and forth on riveting conversations like can people believe in God and aliens or what was the best 80s movie or the thought process behind why Dustin would think pressuring washing a rug would be a good idea, only like 6 people are going to listen. Might as well post it on a blog.

A friend of mine passed away suddenly and unexpectedly to what seems like the world’s dismay (y’all she touched so many lives). That I thought about her a lot.  She had closer friends than what we were, but anytime she reached out to you or spoke to you, she made you feel like you were the only person that mattered. And you so matter. She also had everyone laughing and was a major bright spot. I want to continue that for her and answer WWJD (What Would Jenny Do).  She would be raw, unfiltered, her unapologetic self, and make sure you know that you are matter. And live life like it should be lived and find humor in the small things. And love unconditionally, be kind and if you can’t say anything nice - keep your mouth shut. And you know what she took pictures of herself. I never do that because I’m super self-conscious of my appearance. I don’t like certain parts of me and that I’m not thin (maybe one day). But all these posts that friends of Jennie have shared, and in the photos there she is enjoying her best life and smiling and having fun. I need to do that more and quick worrying about what other people think. I already know what the people that matter think, and dang it, that’s all that I should care about. (Easier said then done but I’m gonna try). I could go on about Jennie and maybe one day I will. 

I was also sitting in church and this verse spoke to me. “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans‬ ‭12:2‬ ‭

In hearing that, what I have been thinking about how short life and WhatWouldJennyDo, I wanted to have a better mindset. And this may take some time not to slip into old habits of being negative, speaking before thinking or jumping to conclusions. But I feel like I need to apologize and explain myself for a few things. (I also think of that scene in Billy Madison where he apologizes to everyone). But I feel that I need to in order to have a renewed mind...to much of my family’s dismay. 

First, those who I have lost touch with, we all do. We grow up and have families and they take priority and work. Don’t think I haven’t forgot you or the times we shared. 

Second, to those that I worked with in the past: I didn’t know how much of my negativity, lack of self confidence, anxiety and depression controlled my personality. It wasn’t until I suffered from Postpartum Depression that I realized how bad anxiety and depression had affected me. I know it seems like an excuse. However, until I got on medication, I didn’t see how I was and why I couldn’t control my emotions. I still struggle with it and that’s okay.

Third, I have jumped to conclusions on things without seeing the entire picture and realizing it really didn’t matter. I needed to take a step back and realize it doesn’t matter. And ask is this really worth the fight? I don’t need to waste my time for things that are going to matter in the long run. 

I hope you enjoy the blog. I promise they won’t be as long as this post, unless Dustin and I are going back and forth on a topic, like board games are supposed to be friendly and you shouldn’t act as if you are going to war to win a game...Dustin. And that I will always be better at Churchill Solitaire. 😜